Today, is the 4th of December. It's my grandmothers Birthday. She would have turned 140 years old! 🌷 I feel more connected to my tradition this year. I feel connected to my home in Santa Rosa, more than to any other place I have lived for a long time. I remember my roots as a reflection of who I am. I mirror my life in them. I am curious. What lessons did I receive? What shaped me? Which stories burn in my heart? Which ones have I let go? Which ones are still waiting for their exit? My grandmother was a grumpy even bitter old woman. She didn't like me much because I was my father's child. Very much like him. Too fast, to sporty, to noisy, too much laughter. Too much sun on our skin and not well behaved enough. Not a good Catholic, not good enough in prayer was one of the sins she despised me for. I was afraid of her harsh judgment. And for my father? He was not good enough for my grandmothers standards. End of story. My mother suffered under her meanness. She was not like her. I revisited the hurt I felt by her rejection for as long as I needed to heal and move on. I did. I learned from her behavior: I will have nothing of this. There is no such thing as not a good enough human being. I will not bigger behind people's back. Well, I learned not to. I worked hard to find my voice and I am still learning. The last Christmas season we celebrated in the United States after moving here in 1987 was in 2009. We lived in Orinda, CA at the time. In 2010 we moved back to Germany. To our roots we thought, but now it feels more like an uprooting to me. In 2015 we moved to Texas... let me tell you, that's another adventure of it's kind. Sarina stayed on in Germany. In an almost overnight and very happy decision, we moved to Santa Rosa in April of this year and Sarina followed. Goodbye Empty Nest for me. For now. For a bit too long I feel, but what do I know which lessons I will get to cherish from this? I vow to have an Empty Nest again. I ordered it. Yes. It's one phone call away. There is a whole story written of what happened this year. So much did not go as planned. And much more did. LOL, who invented the word "plan" anyway? As I reflect, I learn that one of my superpowers is 💪🏼 ADAPTABILITY. Another one, I am a 💪🏼 WARRIOR WOMAN. I don't give up. I fight back. I know how fear looks like and challenge it. It has to go on its knees so I can move towards my dreams. With a deep breath I step over my obstacles - every day. 💪🏼 I bend but, I don't break. I feel a few more superpowers arising as I type. I am growing something big. I dare to say this out loud: 💪🏼 I do manifest. It's in the power of my soul. I am getting clear about what I want and: I ask for it out loud. Oma Aloisia would not want any of that. Her imagined resistance to the woman I am makes me smile today. I would stand up to her now and love her anyway. 🎄Crafting our advent wreath and preparing the home for the Holidays brings me back to memories of her and my childhood. To my roots. I feel them grow strong and reach out to the word. I know they give me the strength to stand up when I fall and to stand tall. Being in this reflective mood, my grandma's birthday today is one of the memories that just pop up. Perhaps she wants me to celebrate? She gave birth to 10 children! Only 4 survived into adulthood. Two lost their lives in World War II. My mother, the youngest, and her brother Leo, the oldest were the only one still alive when they had to leave their home, their friends and memories behind. They were part of the expulsion of Germans from Czechoslovakia after World War II. I am a child of all of this. So much to tell here. I feel it coming... the book I have been dreaming and speaking about? It wants to come out. I had no plan to write this much today. My fingers did! As the sky turns dark outside my window, I look at that picture of her. I will get up now and light the advent candle for her. She would approve of that. She would smile. Sarina will soak up the story. She is our families history queen. I will bow my head to everything my grandma went through, everything she taught me. I will salute her tonight! Happy Birthday, Oma Aloisia!🌷 With love, Manuela🦋 Here is a thing that slipped in... sorry Oma... AND thanks to my older sister Evi for picking it up and counting better.... OMA ALOiSIA TURNED 130 yesterday not 140! ☺️
8 Comments
🌷FREE PRIVATE YOGA SESSIONS FOR YOU IF WHO LOST YOUR HOME IN THE FIRE🌷
I opened up my schedule to share what I love most. Yoga and Mindfulness practice feeds my soul and connects me to my core and the universe. I love private yoga session. Click the link below to read more. I am no stranger to grief and loss. The tragedy of the wildfires that changed all of our lives up here in beautiful Santa Rosa keeps walking around with us like we are wearing a different and unfamiliar layer of clothes. We are living with the sadness and we know we need to move on. I want to share my 30 years of yoga and yoga therapy practice with you. My family belongs to the "lucky" ones, our home and neighborhood survived the fire but the strain of the evacuation and fear are still hanging on. FOR THE ONES WHO LOST EVERYTHING I AM OFFERING FREE💗PRIVATE YOGA SESSIONS IN MY HOME STUDIO. PLEASE TAKE ADVANTAGE - YOGA IS A HEALING TOOL FOR LIFE. For everyone else, if you are new to yoga, give it a try. I support you on your path. If you are already a student, please keep it in your life! I have different packaged available. Talk to me if you have questions. If you like to gift someone with Private Yoga Session, I have gift certificates available. 💡click below for more information or to book your session. https://yogawithmanuela.satoriapp.com/book "I don't shine if you don't shine!" Manuela www.yogawithmanuela.com Magic in the shower is part of a wonderful collection from my treasure chest. We all need tools to fill up our cup. If you are raising a child with special needs learning to pause will be your survival tool for the rest of your life. Magic Moments help me stay sane in the extraordinary challenge of raising my daughter. If you're dealing with the overwhelm from daily life, or with loss and grief you must learn to pause and make yourself a priority again and again. I'm no stranger to loss. It was a hot summer day in August of 1990. We had moved to the United States from Germany a year before. At 8:15 pm on August eights my daughter Sarina was born four months early, weighing only one pound and fifteen ounces. She barely had a chance to live through the night. Everything changed drastically for me. My world fell apart. As a mother raising a child with severe health challenges my personal time collapsed into caring for her. The dream I was holding to have a happy family with four healthy kids in tow shattered. I had to create a new way of living. Losing ourselves happens in any devastating experience we're going through. Tragedy takes over our lives, and we leave ourselves behind. As we grieve our loss, when everything falls apart, we need to slowly find our way back to create meaning and joy in the life we do have. When my daughter, now twenty-eight moved back home about a year ago because her independent living program failed to support her, I was immediately in a crisis. The empty nest I had been working really hard for was full again. My newfound freedom to teach yoga, write my book and spend undisturbed time with my husband had to be put on hold. Again. Sarina was without a day structure and besides her strong wish to be independent, she does not self-monitor herself. She cannot manage her day alone. Someone needs to hold things together for her or her life falls apart. Living with her as a special adult doubled the challenges I faced when she was a child. We had moved to a new city, my husband suffered from PTSS, and I became the 24/7 caretaker once more. Without friends or family or any support established it brought me to my knees. I was so exhausted, dark thoughts had an easy way to enter my mind; I wanted to give up. My daughter's limitations became mine. After all the tears were cried, I got up and remembered: If the thought of getting through the next hour feels unbearable, I can try to get through the next minute. Sometimes to pause for a breath or two saved me from giving up. My magic moments are my survival tool. To create tiny islands that belong to me and to me alone is why I thrive and have the strength to move on. To get up after I fall. They are like stars in the sky. They help me shine, energized my body, mind, and spirit when the demands feel unbearable. We need to have time to feel ourselves. It's critical to not fall into victim mode. Victim mode kills the next step we could be doing to save ourselves. To breath, be mindful and to slow down is a lifesaver for me. I have learned, that I need to love myself enough to not let my obstacles run the show. My magic moments help me do just that. To P a u s e is my mantra. And little moments, that aren't little are my survival tools. They belong to me like the breath I take. They help me to honor the part of my life not connected to be a mother. And, they give me the energy to be the mother my daughter needs and deserves. In the pause
Here is my # 1 pause: Magic in the Shower -PDF for printing is attached below Instead, to continue to think of the million things on my to-list or my despair I step into my to-be list once the water is turned on. I love to wash away the stories my body and mind cling to. I step into my senses and into the present moment on the spot. Water is a great metaphor to help me do that. It hasn't failed me. The success is in my smile. 🚿 Stand facing the shower head and allow the water to run down directly onto the back of the neck. Focus on feeling the water on your back for a few moments. ⭐️ Let your shoulders drop ⭐️ Let go of everything else you might be holding on to by relaxing your hands and your grip ⭐️ Take three deep breaths - feel yourself breath ⭐️ Listen to the water ⭐️ Feel it touch your skin. Feel the temperature of the water ⭐️ Smell the aroma of the soap ⭐️ close your eyes and feel. Cry or sing or smile. Become super aware of everything you are feeling and experiencing at that moment. No judgment needed. Just being present! Take this peaceful moment with you on your day. 💡 I believe in visualization. When challenged during the day, I close my eyes, take a deep breath and visualize this moment. It's a charm you own. Pause - Please! 🌷"I DON'T SHINE IF YOU DON'T SHINE!" Manuela PS: You can skip knowing that but don't skip your charm. We have seven main energy centers in our body called Chakras. Another one worth understanding is an energy center right where the neck meets the head. It's called the Cerebellum Chakra. When this energy center is strong, it manifests as feeling in touch and inspired by our dreams. It lets us access our soul contract. Connects us to our intuitive voice. PPS: I love to hear from you. Do you experience Magic in the Shower? Or have little moments that help you keep your cup full? Share them with me! Manuela Rohr Is a writer and Yoga teacher/therapist BDY/EY, C-IAYT. With roots in Germany she now lives with her husband and daughter in Santa Rosa, CA. She is the mother of a micro preemie girl and shares her healing journey in her blogs and teachings. She offers her transformational Yoga and Mindfulness lessons in workshops and private sessions. Her newly developed transformational program for special moms like her now has a dedicated private Facebook group you can join: https://bit.ly/2Oa0T60 Connect with her here: EMAIL: [email protected] WEBSITE: www.yogawithmanuela.com NEWSLETTER: Sign up here FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/yogawithmanuela/ https://www.facebook.com/sarina24weeks/
This is a reflection I shared on Facebook about the poster I created a year ago.
the message is what I am reflecting upon... - the body is just one of the many parts that make us human... - flexibility is not just a shape of the body, it is much more a quality of the mind. - For me it's much more connected to: - where to give - where to take. - say yes or say no. etc. - to be adaptable not holding a grudge E.g. All of the opposites (triggers) that keep knocking on our door daily. I have been after this kind of flexibility all of my life. It taught me to notice and be fiercely aware when I get stuck. It's our human conditioning that it happens. Triggers are everywhere. I could tell you about 20 of mine on the spot😆. Perhaps I am diving into this later😏. Here is what I learn as I go: 1. my noticing it is the first step to get unstuck. Noticing with curiosity not defeat and blame. 2. choosing something different, like from a different view, different mindset, not from an old habit. That is the work we need to do... it is difficult. That means "bending" so I don't break to me. 3. Step three is the life challenge we have: making this a way of life I am on this journey with you... as a yogi, I can offer this: When you notice you are stuck: 💡remember to notice your breath 💡take refugee in a moment of pause 💡give yourself some flexibility around the helpless feeling of being stuck 💡breathe again 💡 look for a different angle... 💡 choose a different approach I promise you this works! It is a practice... we are not suddenly enlightened and never get stuck again....LOL... But the reaction to being stuck can change...one trigger at a time. Happily unstuck in this moment ... Manuela "I DON'T SHINE IF YOU DON'T SHINE". 🦋 Sarina's world was brutally rocked out of shape when the wildfires broke out on our hill. Just like ours. The "only" difference? Sarina lives with the Autism Spectrum Disorder. She deals with challenges differently. Her emotions can lock her up inside her own world. Her interaction with others is often challenged. How could she deal with a life-threatening event like this? It was this picture, this grief she showed but couldn't express, that kept pushing me to write about this experience. In order to help her, I needed her to open up and be able to talk about what's hunting her. It was the enormity of this immensely difficult time that the story grew big and bigger. I divided it into three parts. Part one is here. Part One If you are reading this and are caught under the impression that autistic people don't feel emotions, let me help you understand why this is wrong. It's my deepest hope to shine a light on the way how my daughter lives her life and how deeply she feels. I burn to learn everything I can about Sarina as much as I burn to heighten the awareness of people who cross her path on how to be with her. Any small act of kindness, or guidance and making her feel included means the world to her. Sarina is highly sensitive, compassionate and vulnerable. Time has a different meaning to her. She processes things very slow, she cannot be rushed. Her actions get very chaotic when under pressure or when she tries to be fast. A threatening reality when faced with a burning hill behind you. Sarina was born in Cincinnati, Ohio at 24 weeks. Weighing 1'15", she did spend the first 6 months of her life in the NICU trying to survive. Her differences stem from this early birth. There is really not one label that fits her. Autism Spectrum next to Sensory Processing Disorder is just one part of who she is. At our home, we frequently say: "Think outside. No box needed." That's really what it takes to understand each other. Not just the people who are different. Sarina is part of the high functioning population who is very capable but cannot live alone. She speaks two languages fluently. She is intelligent and hungry for knowledge. Since 3 months she is enrolled in a special college track at Santa Rosa Junior College. Planning for a career in Social Justice. The college has become her sanctuary. Finally, a place where she is seen and challenged. It's the eye level relationship that people like Sarina crave. The college does an amazing job offering just that. But she is also very distractable and absentminded. Following directions is hard for her - for many reasons. Not processing the spoken word like we do is just one of them. Words or sentences spoken to fast get lost. Having a mind that cannot concentrate and constantly bombards you with a library worth of information doesn't help the process of paying attention to what's in front of you. She has a big zest for life. She wants what we all want: She yearns to belong, have a partner, have friends and a meaningful career. But she needs someone who helps her hold it all together. Daily life is challenging when your drum has a different beat than most people around you. Right now and for the last eight months I have been holding that space. Supporting her growth, helping her along. Before, she lived in a supported living arrangement in Germany for a couple of years. Yet the lack of academic possibilities made us search for another solution back in the U.S. were she has lived most of her life. When we learned about this special college program we moved to Santa Rosa, California and she moved back in with us. It was meant to be a temporary hop back into the nest. A new supported living program was also planned to open here. Sadly we just learned that it did not get licensed. We lost that opportunity. My nest will be full for a while longer. A demanding job for me and my husband and a challenge for Sarina as well. I believe that there is a bigger plan. I know I'm made for this. When the challenges become all-consuming, like when dealing with the extra fear of losing our home, I remember: I will not let my crown slip. I will not break by this challenge. There is more for me to learn. There must be a bigger plan. When I am close to falling down I pick myself up again. It happens that the never-ending need my daughter has become too heavy to carry. I have to go back to my tools. When I remember to pause, remember to breathe and tap into my source I gain strength and support because I am not doing this alone. I do this for myself. I do it for my daughter. I do it for every mother, every parent raising a special child. And in terms for everyone who deals with extraordinary challenges. My tools can be yours. We special moms are not meant to break. We are meant to hold the torch out in front of our children to lighten their path and at the same time igniting our own light. We are meant to brighten the sky with all the stars that have been denied by society to right to shine. Can you imagine how bright the sky can be if we help our children star to shine? I can. I see it every day. It's my mission to gather all the tools I use to help me keep my dream alive and carry my crown high while supporting Sarina to live up to hers. Sarina teaches me to not get stuck in assumptions: there is not one correct way to show our feelings. Emotions and how we live with them come in many shapes. It takes a willingness to be fresh, to drop our expectations and become super curious about who is in front of us. I am learning this every single day. Sarina feels deeply. But her communication of what she feels is often either off or on. "Off" is the harder one to deal with. What to do when I can't reach her? "On" happens when she tends to be obsessed with something. But she can be guided out of the "on" phase a bit easier. People on the spectrum often feel more intense then we do. Often hidden from our view. Especially when Sarina withdraws behind a veil of silence for no apparent reason it's patience and surrender that keep us afloat. It's that place we as Neuro Typicals (NT) cannot go. When I run because we are late she might be sitting in self-talk not able to move. "I have to sort out what's happening on my own terms first", is how Sarina explains this. "I cannot respond to you, my neurons don't understand. It's when I am on overload when it's too loud, too busy, too much everything that I need to give myself a break". It's not natural for her to share her feelings the way its second nature for most of us. We all know someone who "ticks" a little different. I choose to be an open book. I am gifted with a strong sense of connection and sharing with others. I am committed to speak and live by my truth. What if this is not a concept you understand? Sarina get's caught in her own inner-world experience. In times of crisis or challenges, this has been the biggest struggle of living with her. When she is withdrawn her ability to follow through with what needs to be done is jeopardized. Discernment is not a skill she has. She can get hooked on a task and cannot stop. She cannot handle being interrupted well. Even if she wants to be adaptable her brain is wired differently. From wanting something to putting it into action she needs to walk through a labyrinth first. Living with Sarina requires time. Time to ask questions. To listen. To explain. It requires immense patience. And most of all big love governed by an open mind to help her put into words what she feels. Or filter out what others don't need to know. TMI (too much information) can be our daily bread. And on the other ends sits NEI (not enough information), equality daunting. It requires the trust and faith that I'm not doing it all alone. Life might not flow the way we have envisioned it but I now know there is divine timing that supports us. We are meant to fulfill our lives plan but we have to be able to step back, again and again, to surrender to the flow. To pause and breathe. And breathe again. The flow of the breath is our lifeline. Whenever we stop and harden our hearts we cut ourselves off that flow. I know how that feels. My biggest spiritual lesson? We need to step out of our storyline. Pause and listen to the whispers of truth that already reside in our hearts. We cannot hear them when we carry an armor of resistance around with us. For the last 27 years, I have observed my daughter. It's a daily practice trying to understand how she feels and how life looks from her perspective. I have learned everything I know about her in the magic moments of being truly present to her. In the stillness and gentleness of the p a u s e. I feel lucky. Lucky I have learned the gift of being a listener. I am an observer by trade. It's the gift of practicing and teaching yoga that helps me to channel my daughter's hidden world out into the open so she too can belong. It's a big hurt for a parent of a special child to feel their loneliness. Not being understood. Not to belong. I have learned, that we as the parents are not enough. We are in desperate need to create the famous "it takes a village" for her. Especially since Sarina is an only child, our blood family is on the other side of the ocean and we are new to this town. I am on my way to create this village for her and for us. Understanding my daughter continues to challenge me to drop labels. There is no such thing for her. She guides the way on being open to everything that appears on our path. And there is immense grace needed that I do forgive myself when I fail. My daughter holds everything for me. She is my biggest teacher and my biggest challenge. No one can trigger me like her. I am a temperamental being, by nature fast and wild. When I lose it with her it breaks my heart. It's her who in those moments can reach out to me saying: "Mschen*, it's o.k. I do understand." *Sarina created the name "Mschen" for me. That's magic right in front of me. My daily yoga and mindfulness practice moves my self-reflection and self-love off the mat and into my daily life. It's a lifesaver for me. Spending enough time in nature especially by visiting and hugging my trees fills me up. It grounds and uplifts me. I know this is my path. My body, my soul, my spirit are all in awe when I dive into the beauty around me. The power of those trees was also present and supported me when the devastation my neighbors and my city had to endure by those fires was nacked right in front of me. In my yoga world, it is the "I bend so I don't break" that stands true for me. It's not just a flexibility of the body, by far not. It is the flexibility in our minds that help us to stand up after the fall. I am on a lifelong quest to understand how Sarina experiences the world. The question: "If you had one day in your life to be someone else, who would you like to be?", I can answer on the spot. "I would love to live in my daughter's body." I wish every day I could feel her feelings, the hidden ones in particular. Does she feel her feet on the ground? "Of course", she says when I ask her. But observing her on the yoga mat gives me a different answer. Standing on one foot is impossible without support, standing on both still looks like she is on shaky ground. She absolutely fits the image of "she has her head in the clouds. We love to quote Rumi: "Your head is the ladder; bring your head down under your feet”. The experience of the two weeks after the fire broke out when we were evacuated and fear was bigger than life humbled me. When I wasn't able to be the bridge for Sarina. I was on foreign terrain with myself, lost in fear and despair. Not being able to help her consumed my nights. The hugs when we cried together without the answers to her fears helped us to build our bridge together and move through our despair to the other side. Look here for part two coming up next! Hugs, Manuela “How is life after the fire? It must be bizarre”, is what my friends ask me on a daily basis. Dear friends from afar I hear your questions. Yes, it is bizarre. Stunning and ugly live next to each other right now. The part of Santa Rosa we live in is untouched by the fire. Yes, that is magic, unbelievable magic. All the shops I go to survived including the area around the college. And right next to it is what you saw on TV. Unnerving scenes. I pass by. I don't go close. What I do get close to are the people. The fires taught me to reach out to my community. Invite a conversation, even so, I think I have no time. That is wrong. I now make that my priority. The hill across from us holds witness to just how close the devastation of our livelihood was. If you look up the hill, the black patches between the trees burned by the fire can be overlooked. But we who live here know, the fire was that close. The rotten smell of old smoke in the air betrays the scene around us. The ashes are still showing up in hidden places. The masks we all have in our cars, homes, and purses remind us - the fire was real and scary. Every day a message from the sheriff peeps on my phone. Another area of Santa Rosa is opened for re-entry. Helicopters are still in the sky several times a day. I salute them each time. When we needed to evacuate the fireman who watched us throw stuff in our car answered my: “Do we have a chance?” with a scary show of his hand. He gestured one inch. The winds were blowing the fire in our direction. What the firefighters accomplished in the next hours by bulldozing a fire line across the mountain is mind-blowing. Our whole neighborhood stands strong because of it. The fire could not cross that line. Our treasured hikes in Annabel Park are different now. Unreal. To the left the beauty of the land is stunning, to the right it’s a scary stinky skeleton the fire left behind. We are reminded every minute just how sacred our life is. Life is knocking on our hearts holding us accountable to live with great honesty and care for our selves and with new importance to care for others. I am by nature and by a lifelong practice of inquiry on a path of embracing of “what is”. The emergency we were in for a few days threatened that. It's like the ground I was standing on did not support me anymore. I was afraid I couldn't hold it all together for us. Especially for Sarina. The gifts of a yogi, of a daily practice of mindfulness in all areas of life, train our nervous system to recover faster when strong emotions like fear hit us. We bounce back. We automatically remember to breathe, we are turning back to equanimity quicker. It does work. That's why I sharpen my tools daily and remind myself to go out and share it with the world. Please do practice. Your energy account cannot be full enough. Dear friends, Santa Rosa sits on a stunning piece of land with strong people. It’s my soul place. It has been from the moment I moved here. I will help heal its wounds. I have tools to share. Paying attention to the breath doesn't need a yoga mat. We can pause everywhere and nourish ourselves with a couple of breath. We can practice the quality of Mountain Pose everywhere we stand. Over the counter kind of mindfulness. It's precious. I taught it to a woman at the dry cleaner. Can you imagine? Changing lives on the go🦋. I am strong. I kick ass if I need to...😌...are you surprised? My home I love so dearly survived. Adam🌳, Victor🌳, and Hugo🌳 did. Sarina's college did. What’s burned and is missing will remind me to celebrate what I have. I am tapping into my source. I will achieve my dreams. Nothing will chain me. Please follow me! Are you? 🦋 With love, Manuela #SantaRosaStrong PS: you can visit my Facebook page to see more photos I stretched my comfort zone on Sunday. I went life on Facebook. A scary thing for me to do. But how will we grow if we don’t challenge ourselves? I like to look my resistance in the eye and do what I’m afraid of. I like to taste lives amazing richness. At first, the fear devils showed up. What if, what if not… blablabla. But I felt way too good in my skin to listen to them. I made the conscious and spontaneous decision to push the life button. I always wanted to!😇. I want to show up in my life. Share with my friends what I experience, what I learn as I go. I knew what I was feeling is something most of us often crave: The feeling of EASE supported by the feeling of being grounded. Both bring deep joy. I felt deeply relaxed and connected to my breath and at the same time vibrantly alive. It is life changing state of being. Crowned by the quality of effortlessness today it was the “I-will-change-the-world-kind-of-feeling” for me. And I wasn’t even on my yoga mat! I received this gift the moment my daughter Sarina left the house with her new friend. Off to do something fun. I have been praying for this. Visualizing it on a daily basis. A mother's heart will always ache if it’s loneliness she witnesses in her child. No matter her age. I took this joy to my yoga room. That’s where I grow the seeds to the life I want to live. I know ease and bliss will not just handed to me. I have to show up for what we want. In the yoga language, ease and steadiness are the first two qualities we learn. If our posture is steady and at ease, our breath can flow freely. Our brain can relax. With all this in mind I pushed the life button on my phone and shared. “Dear future empire, here I come.” Of course with my 👑 on! A very humbling experience at first - but all so uplifting as I quickly forgot my fear. I recommend you try it out. Or - if this isn’t your thing 💗find something in your life you are shying away from and take the risk to do it. The extra heartbeat feels delicious. Do it now. Don't wait! Everything I mentioned above are qualities of a Yogi. Everybody can learn to grow them on the mat. Find a teacher who knows how to create an experience that soothes your nervous system. Rather than irritates it. Where doing is replaced by feeling and by the art of receiving. Slow and deep breath are our nervous system’s best friends. Yoga is an inward journey. And so is happiness. Peace comes from being completely present. Not by rushing from one thing to the next. That's how being 'life' today felt to me. Do you know that our nervous system is our communicator with spirit? I heard someone speak about this a couple of years ago. He said: “An agitated nervous system fails to receive our spirit’s guidance. Just as a warped antenna cannot receive television signals properly.” I have been embracing yogas gifts for over thirty years. Practicing it mindfully is important to me. Let’s not reduce our yoga practice to one more thing we check off our list. To become one more hectic episode in our lives. Let's practice, let's be brave and authentic and stretch our comfort zone. I promise you it will help transform your life! I went to sleep that night with this amazing feeling of deep joy and gratefulness for this day. And then it was Monday. Las Vegas shattered us to the ground. The tragic, the pain, the horror, the helplessness delivered the exact opposite feelings. All I felt on Sunday turned into a wrenched up gut and a weeping heart. My daughter was very disturbed. "How I am supposed to feel about this?" Being an activist as a person with special needs makes her extra vulnerable. I didn’t have an answer for her. We feel peaceful only if we feel safe. I searched my heart, how could I support her? And I remembered my practice. The feeling I so cherished yesterday. I remembered the power of the breath together with the feeling of ease that comes with it. One deep and slow breath can get us off the roller coaster of fear and defeat and into a moment of inner peace. How we speak, feel, act is different in this state. This is the deeper goal of yoga. No matter what happens on the outside, I can tap into my inner spirit. And be at peace. Even in the midst of deep tragedy, we can remember to breathe. No, breathing does not take away the pain. But with each slow and deep breath, we can help our fearfully beating heart to slow down. We can help our nervous system to stay calm. We must remember that. It is our duty to care for body, our mind and our soul. We must connect to our breath and learn to witness the influence it has on who we are and how we do what we do. I know this might sound all too simple for someone new to Yoga. It is not. It's the most powerful gift I can share. And, in the conversation with my daughter, something else was clear: Showing up and standing up is no longer a luxury or an ideal. It's becoming critical. Our voices and each of our actions count. We cannot afford to look the other way. I need to get involved more deeply in healing myself and our earth. I owe this to my daughter. And to all the generations following us. Growing and offering my skills to my tribe and sharing my story is not an option anymore. 💗Think of a small or large difference you can make today by stepping out of your comfort zone. Give someone a hand, a smile, a friendly world and forgive someone. Our world needs you! I am holding my hands in front of my heart, I bow my head to all the people who lost their lives and the once suffering in the face of this tragedy. Namaste! With love, Manuela🦋 www.yogawithmanuela.com "This post is part of the Empowering the Goddess Within Blog Tour hosted by www.BraveHealer.com! To read more entries and potentially win a fun prize, visit the tour page HERE: http://lauraprobert.com/empowering-goddess-within-blog-tour-2017/ Our voice - the most powerful sound on the planet by Manuela Rohr At a time when good girls were quiet, it was hard for my tree climbing spirit to soar and be seen. I was lucky my dad understood this deep seated urge to be free. He shared that hunger to move with me. Shhh...d into silence I didn't know how to be or sit still. Sports in school saved me from suffocating. Here the universe provided an outlet for me. The freedom I craved was satisfied by the speed. The faster I ran the deeper my dads love grew, was a powerful extra bonus. On the sports fields, he broke the rules for me. I was cheering at the top of my lungs, blossoming because I was seen. Outside of sport, my voice was crushed. Behave! was the rule I obeyed. The daily reminder ...to never start a sentence with an I... was paralyzing. Nobody taught me what place on the planet I belonged. My dad was tough, often choleric but cared a great deal about speaking his truth. But he hurt our feelings and lost his temper too quick in our day to day life. Why he was silent and wanted to blend in outside of the sports world? I couldn't understand. I didn’t know about the other layers of silence my family was hiding under until I was older. All was different with my mother. She was gentle and polite, never rough. She didn’t care much about sports but was happy for my victories. I didn’t understand why she never spoke up. I saw her swallow her words often and sometimes cry. I copied that from her when it was dangerous to be around my dad. Unfortunately, she also fueled my fear of him: “Wait until your dad comes home,” poured panic in my bones. My mother used this thread often to stop my wildness. And the evening would come and with it the spanking. I chewed hard on those tears, the humiliation at the dinner table. My hero failed me. My mother and older siblings were afraid, they looked the other way. I buried my voice deep down with the food on my plate that got stuck in my narrowing throat. I didn’t understand this mix of emotion. This love one day and punishment the next. Being loud now and silent in an hour. Much later I started to understand this puzzle. When I finally peeled away the layers of why speaking up in certain circumstances was hard for me. After World War Two my parents were part of the expulsion of ethnic Germans from Czechoslovakia. Their ancestors had lived there for many generations. Forced out, they had to leave everything they knew and owned behind. They met in a refugee camp in Germany. From there they migrated to designated villages to find work. Local people despised them.The village I grew up in was hostile to us. I didn't have words for this as a child but when I learned about my roots it explained many of my childhood whys. It finally helped me understand the silence I saw in my parents that were so foreign to me. It was their way to survive. With their silence they were grinding that skill into our being: Be nice. Be quiet. It’s the only way to belong. I am not a quiet person. I am not shy. The voice I had as a girl grew stronger with the years. It's now a powerful tool which serves me well as a Yoga Teacher. I learn about myself on my mat every day. Living and speaking my truth is the corner stone of my life. The goddess within aches to stand tall in my worthiness. I do not want to be a copy of anything. I am committed to healing where I am holding myself back. Yet deep engraved into my make up lay the roots to why I was silent when the risk of not being liked was in the air. It explained why certain people loved me until they found out about my parent's history. I married into a family where this trait kept me from speaking my truth. I faked the good girl for almost thirty years. Until my daughter shook my world. She will not let anybody off the hook who speaks down to her because she has extra challenges. I saw her unapologetic speak her truth to them. This tugged at my heart. The wild, compassionate warrior woman I am needed to show up everywhere. I had to uncover more of my whys. Open the wound deep inside where my stories survived. The hidden words had to pass the silence and come out. My inner voice grew loud and was begging me to act. And I did. My Yoga practice helps me uncover the blocks I have buried in my throat. It is the most powerful tool I can share. How we speak relies on the flow of our breath. Our throat chakra* holds this truth for us. Unspoken words get stuck in our throat. Sabotaging our voice, adding layers of fear to the silence. My breath now is the hero I can go to when speaking is tough and the good girl wants to come back. Today, my roots do not define how I speak my truth anymore. My deep hunger to be true to myself does. Our gifts and stories are powerful. Uncovering and sharing them with the world is not optional anymore. As warrior women, we carry the responsibility to be brave in our hearts. We must use our courage to stand up strong, clear what is holding us back and teach each other to not be quiet. Our voices can only be heard when shared. They are the most powerful sound on the planet. *energy center in the body Manuela Rohr is a BDY/EYU Yoga Teacher and C-IYAT Yoga Therapist www.yogawithmanuela.com Receiving the breath is a result of relaxation not effort
part 2 How to receive the breath? In my last blog post I outlined some of my thoughts about what it means to receive the breath. I was on a roll… the post turned out really long…never the less, it contains some important nuggets I feel worth knowing about. If you want to read it, you can find it here: ♥︎ http://archive.aweber.com/awlist4674561/LMJHe Today - I’ll keep it short! Breathing is something our body knows how to do. It’s the heart and soul of who we are. Just imagine a healthy baby breathing. There is no effort. Our busy and often noisy life styles can keep us from connecting with ourselves. If you are not familiar with deep natural breathing and your life is stressful, your breath is probably shallow. Our awareness is bombarded with all that happens outside of ourselves. We feel there is no time to look within. Or may be within is more like a foreign country you have not visited yet. If the last thought is true for you, put that trip on your bucket list. To connect with our true self is the only way to understand anything in life. For me that’s were happiness lies! Come join me: I will be teaching at Absolute Center in Lafayette Saturday September 9 and 30 + October 28, 2017 from 3:30 pm - 5:30 pm see flyer below And - here is something I want to share with you. I have spend a lot of time with my daughter Sarina on breath awareness. Due to her premature birth she has only 40% of her lungs available. Her natural breath is shallow. She rarely breathes a deep yogic breath. She does, when she is practicing with me. And what becomes crystal clear when one observes her while breathing, as soon as she relaxes, when she brings her awareness inside (Sarina can only accomplish that with her eyes closed), her breath deepens and develops into a full, effortless breath. She is r e c e i v i n g the breath! Watch the short video below. I hope it helps you get in touch with your own breath. Do it tonight, before you fall asleep. You will go on a journey to yourself. I can promise you that. click here for the video: https://youtu.be/SOr43pOSHkQ Namaste, Manuela www.yogawithmanuela.com A Happy Hello From Germany! It has been a bit silent in my yoga world. For the last almost three weeks we have been in Germany. We’r packing up our belongings from six years of living here. A few more days and we will be back in California. - All three of us!* A reason to celebrate! For the last 2.5. years while we were living in Texas and Sarina stayed in Germany I learned a lot about a few things. Here are two of them: SURRENDER I embrace my yoga practice for having taught me that skill. EVERY time I'm on my mat and greet my body she has a new story to tell. Moving our bodies with awareness and love and a keen eye on were we resist opens up the door to understanding ourselves better. Yes, ON and OFF the mat. It’s in us showing up. It’s in the quiet reflection in between poses we learn to understand what our bodies need. Right there our practice moves from being only a physical stretch. Into a connection to the deeper levels of who we are. We learn the fine balance between effort and surrender. And about our EDGE. All of this repeats itself the moment we bring this awareness into our lives. Living far away from my daughter Sarina, knowing the special needs she has - I needed that skill. LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! IT HAS A VOICE! IT HAS YOUR STORY TO TELL! ACCEPTANCE rolls in with surrender as it brings clarity to the areas in our life where we attach and want something different then we have. On the mat it's clearly defined when stiff joints or tight muscles show up. When staying present is the challenge because our minds are on overload. When we think we have no time. At first we often resist. We want something else of course. Awareness and paying attention is the key to accepting “what is”. It gifts us OPENNESS! The opposite of CLOSING DOWN. If we do that, miracles happen. Things shift. I could not know where and how to find a way to bring the three of us closer again. Like in all challenging life situation we have to embrace the “I do not know!” with all of who we are. I was burning to give Sarina the chance she deserves. And us the life that is easier to live. I knew she needed to be moved out of the shadow and into the light. I honor my practice for supporting me in this. Take a moment now. sit tall feet on the ground lift your heart soften your shoulders close your eyes g e n t l y breathe in and out repeat YOU DESERVE THIS. WE ALL NEED POCKETS OF SILENCE IN OUR BUSY LIVES. One breath at the time, fill up your cup. It’s in the silent moments we realize who we are and what we need. It’s not about it being easier. It’s about W E being truer. With love and see you soon on the mat! Manuela PS... by all stresses and time struggles life can throw our way... cut yourself some slack. Make sure you spend time in nature. Somewhere were the only thing you hear are the sounds of nature and your heart beat! Living with Sarina, the way she needs guidance, is my daily reminder of how important it is! I need to choose wisely what's most important in my life. *to those new to my blog. Our daughter Sarina is on the Autism Spectrum. We have been spending our time between Germany and the U.S. the last 6 years so she could continue her education. Now we are all three together again one country and that is a huge reason to celebrate! Kneipp Cures are very popular in Germany. We can do the treatments here in my hometown Speyer for free in a beautiful park behind a church.
You walk the cold waters like a stork. On a hot day it not only helps to reduce swelling in your feet, it immediately does "bling bling" (Sarina) in side the brain😂 She is so right. It feels like doing a headstand to me🙃...more clarity, new perspective, huge smile on the face! To find out more about "Father Kneipp" click here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sebastian_Kneipp |